THE DOLLHOUSE: Jetsetter Dolls - Days in Ponta Do Ouro

The Dollhouse had an exciting and eventful year in 2011 with too much happening I couldn’t type fast enough to keep you updated. I have tales of book launches, Vampires and One Million Stars, of faces scared and facebook statuses. In 2012 there will be no holding of tongues, no thinking before typing and no censoring of my thoughts.

There’s plenty of time for those updates. But first the highlight of 2011 was the Dollhouse December trip to Ponta Do Ouro. The Mother of all Adventures!!

Having pulled an all nighter from over-excitement the Dolls, excitedly loaded our Spacious Quantum with everything from DIY hammocks to home malaria tests with the help of Patrick our still trusted and worthy Driver at the crisp hour of 4am. Having been assured that Mr P knew exactly how to get to the Kosi Bay boarder we all made ourselves comfortable and passed out cold for just over 3 hours, when we were woken for breakfast and grocery shopping before we cross the border. Thank God Almighty for Social networking because if it wasn’t for our feverent facebook status updates we would have Only realized once at the Komatipoort border that we were.... well.... lost!!

As we all contacted our separate connections for an urgent detour route to the Kosi bay boarder, before batteries died and signals lost through borders crossed we managed to find our way... through Swaziland.

So with an extra stamp in our passport we steadily made our way through our booze stock, to calm the nerves of course, and Mr P blasted Rhianna’s “Cheers to the Frigging weekend we came to terms with the fact that this was going to be a looooong road trip. Even after having our strength of characters tested when our, no longer so trusted, Mr P was held for a 2 grand ransom at the South African border in KZN.

I mean really? We managed our way right across Swaziland with a couple of SZL50 (Emalangeni) bribes, but to get back into our country of

bribes, but to get back into our country of residence – where we are all legal citizens – we are pleasantly informed that Mr P is to be arrested and our Quantum impounded leaving us stranded if we refuse to pay the bribe!! I tell you it took all the batting of eyelids we could muster and our best damsel in distress expressions as we begged, pleaded and flirted for Mr P’s freedom. As we smugly pulled off in the general direction of Kosi Bay, Mr P with a new found respect for us, we knew that nothing could keep us from Ponta D’Oura!!

Not even having to spend the night in the now, not so spacious comfy Quantum while locals gathered around us plotting in Portuguese and peering through our misted windows. Shivering in our bones despite the unbearable heat yet too afraid to open the window lest a local grabs something... or one of us. Until of course someone could not hold their bladder any longer... what with all the alcoholic imbibing going on it was inevitable. So I (yes it was me) braved a fate of foreign rape, Kamikaze mosquito attacks, malaria and xenophobic murder I ventured into the unknown with Josh as my meagre, but only protection. That moment alone is filed as one of the most terrifying 3.5 minutes of my life.

But as the scorching African Sun rose it softened the dangers and suddenly everyone seemed smaller, safer... and friendlier.

After promising not to celebrate until we were sure nothing else could go wrong we felt it safe to do our little happy dance once successfully stamped and through the border posts into Mozambique....

But I’m sure you’ve realized this was not going to be one of those smooth sailing holiday’s. So as Murphy sat back laughing at the effects of his law, our (now huge and heavy) Quantum got stuck in the sinking sand!

Non English Speaking Locals to the Rescue (we would learn during our stay that for a price, this was the way of the Ponta’s) with lots of hand gestures, sign language, guessing and confusion, Mr P’s Quantum was towed out of the sandpit and all the Dolls (and Josh) were loaded onto what looked like a cattle van!

Cindy Bonelle

And so began the ride of our lives. Flying over steep hills and bumping into deep ditches, we crouched to avoid being bounced right off, the little cattle van that had saved the day and took us to our Chalet... For a not so small price of course.